Well... the Wizard of OZ is quite the host. He's a gentle man, efficient professional and his elves are very laid back but attentive - even of course lets not leave out the thirsty vampires, two stabs, five vials in 24 hours- so far!
Get this - I've literally had my head checked! Its funny as hell - the Doc comes into my room, exactly when I am in the midst of bonding with my very cool room mate, when he bluntly says with a smirk. - I'm sending you to have your head checked!! I immediately flash back to when I was a rambunctious kid doing stupid things and getting into trouble and my mother would bellow in frustration - "Young lady you should have your head checked - what were you THINKING"!!! -Of course, I was at the very young age of NOT thinking.
But here I am, wise ol' broad beyond my age of 45, on my first day of being in the psych ward and the doc is delivering the news that I'm going to be sent to have my head checked - Both my room mate and I burst into laughter and then it hit me that he was actually serious!!! "For real"? Off to the Cat Scan we go to see if the boogie man has actually taken up residence in the nooks and crannies of my grey matter!! I just about shit when he left the room and we had several chuckles. I mentioned to my roommate how outrageous this would be for my blog post!!
Admission was anxiety/scarey/freaky - worse than airport kinda freaky. Confiscations of shit you'd never even think of, like vitamins and a completely wireless policy. There are absolutely no electronics permitted in the ward. No wifi, no cell phones, no hair dryers, no radio, and television is allowed only after 3pm on weekdays and all day on weekends. But the TV room is where the creepy guys lounge and "excrete".
So, I am out on a weekend day pass to escape the "advanced cases". As they have to stay under strict supervision, as all other normal plain clothed mild crazies like me are allowed to leave for the weekend on strict rules, and I didn't want to be left behind alone with the psychotics. "RUN Forrest RUN!!" LOL
The advanced "clients" are what keeps you on your toes. There's the pacers, who walk a trench into the floor back and forth from am to pm non stop. There's the ones that are in hospital clothing that are totally unpredictable. And then there are the ones they keep behind glass enclosed rooms directly across from the nursing station with full visibility with the lights on 24 hrs. They sleep on the floor on a mattress and nothing else in the room. They get their meds and are allowed out of the fishbowl for a few hours and you need to watch your back.
My anti anxiety meds are pleasantly gentle and I even have a prescription for my intense case of Irritable Bowel Syndrome" Hopefully they will up the dose on that one, because the food at the Rockyview is dog food, and causing me a great deal of pain in the digestive system.- not a good path to be on!!
My lunch yesterday was a bare, very skinny plain piece of chicken breast and nothing else on the plate. NOTHING- no packaged processed mashed potato, no tasteless vitamin depleted poor excuse for a freezer vegetable, no sodium gravy- just naked chicken on the plate!!! Actually, if tests were conducted for nutrition I'm willing to bet the dog food I feed my dog is actually more nutritious for the dog than the nutrition you receive in the hospital. HOW FUCKED is THAT!!?
Ahhh.. the trials and tribulations of obtaining a better lifestyle thru mental health!! The week will be busy with hoops to jump and obstacles to overcome and of course, medically enforced relaxation, then exercise and the all mighty "cogitative behavioral classes". I'm looking forward to art therapy, just pissed that all my art supplies and easel are in the mountains. You know.. the mountain view that's already very therapeutic and the air and the sun/deck/gardening/painting and the freedom to enjoy it all with out "Special Permissions" and having to wake up hearing the psychotics screaming and body slamming the glass room walls begging for the nurse for their meds. Some how that's all supposed to make sense!! Eventually - maybe? I'm gonna stick it out. Nothing ventured, nothing gained.
All in good time - trying to trust the process. I am a voluntary patient so I can run for the hills if it gets too much. Patience and courage. LOTS of it!!! ...And visitors and flowers, I've won the husband lottery - he's been my "Night in "Charming" Armour"!!
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