Its no wonder I feel the way I do...sensitive to being stood up, long weekend or not. For this is the third year in a row that I've been stood up on my bday celebrations. Plans fell thru, "so and so" couldn't make it... because.
I'm turning a milestone this year it meant a lot to me to be with friends. I wanted something simple inexpensive and fun, just to be with people and have some laughs, someplace interesting. I have ten days to go and already the plans are starting to "fall thru" calls are not being returned, promises are weakening.
It is becoming increasingly difficult not to assume a complex. My thoughts usually turn to "have I been that bad a friend over the years...am I that difficult to be with... is this really just coincidence?" The intentions are seemingly true..and yet I'm still sitting here waiting for someone to call and say, yes its a go, we're all meeting in an hour or two - as we originally planned.
Again, I'm that woman in the movies sitting at the table of life alone, all dressed up and no one shows. Ten more days till my bday, and its tempting to just take control and throw my own party and invite, plan, purchase, organize, cook, clean - and inevitably wait, at the table alone once again feeling like I've done something wrong.
I'm trying to chalk it up to bad birthday juju...
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